listening for the good

Stephen: First I want to talk about—you have issued another beautiful book inspired by your late mother. It's called Just Shine!. One of the things I understand she says is, you don't know what's going on with someone else. You may disagree with them.

Justice Sotomayor: You have to ask them.

Stephen: Does that come in handy in your job?

Justice Sotomayor: A lot. But she showed me something else, which is you can't really judge people by their opinions because you may differ in them. You may not like what people do. One of my favorite stories—she had a friend who talked nonstop. How many of you have those kinds of friends? I bet a lot of you. They walk in, they never stop talking. My brother and I would scurry out of the room as fast as we could. My brother would probably go out to play basketball. I would go hide in my room and read. My mother would sit there and just listen.

One day after this woman had left, I looked at her and said, "How do you have that patience?" And she said, "Sonia, it can be frustrating moments, but I always remember that she really has such a wonderful heart. When I've been sick, she comes over and she's the first one to bring me food. If I am stuck not having a ride somewhere"—so she didn't drive at the time—"I call her up and she offers before I say anything. Not everybody does that."

She taught me to look for the best in people. That was the lesson that moment gave me, and it's one I look for in my colleagues, you know. I don't agree with them much—at least not with the majority—and they can be really frustrating. And there are moments when I want to scurry out of the room. But I don't. And what I look for to maintain our collegiality is the good in them. My mother was right—there is good in almost everyone. I say "almost everyone" because I was a prosecutor, and there are some evil people.

Sotomayor, Sonia. Interview by Stephen Colbert. The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. YouTube, uploaded by The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, 10 Sept. 2025, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKSzq4keAx8.

empathic communication

Business practices evolve rapidly, but there’s one technique business leaders should always rely on to effectively motivate and lead: empathic communication. Develop and show empathy for everyone involved in your corporate transition, and you’ll lead a team that feels valued, included, and driven to help your initiative succeed.

Patti Sanchez

"The Secret to Leading Organizational Change Is Empathy," Harvard Business Review. December 20, 2018

acknowledge fears

While you may need to keep some facts private during a transition, the general rule is that the more informed your people are, the more they’ll be able to deal with discomfort. So, learn about your team’s specific fears, then acknowledge them openly.  

Patti Sanchez

"The Secret to Leading Organizational Change Is Empathy," Harvard Business Review. December 20, 2018

how information is communicated

When I sat down with the CEO and her executive team to think through their communication plan, I asked not about the change itself, but about how her employees might feel about what’s ahead. We started with her team because, in my work as a communication consultant, I’ve observed the same thing time and time again: how information is communicated to employees during a change matters more than what information is communicated. A lack of audience empathy when conveying news about an organizational transformation can cause it to fail.

Patti Sanchez

"The Secret to Leading Organizational Change Is Empathy," Harvard Business Review. December 20, 2018

swap the battlefield for the boardroom.

CEOs love a good war metaphor — “battlegrounds,” “offensives,” “fighting for market share.” It sounds bold. Strategic. Even inspiring.

But new research from João Cotter Salvado and Donal Crilly shows that this language may backfire — especially with financial analysts.

📉 Analysts interpret war metaphors not as strength, but as signals of recklessness and risk. In fact, just a 1% uptick in war-related language can lead to a 20% increase in negative analyst sentiment.

In volatile markets or for dominant firms, the effect is even worse.

💡 The takeaway? Words matter. Especially when the audience is trained to assess risk.

👉 Leaders: Swap the battlefield for the boardroom. Choose metaphors that signal stability, not chaos.

João Cotter Salvado and Donal Crilly

"Research: When CEOs Use War Metaphors, Analysts Worry," Harvard Business Review. January 3, 2025

#Leadership #Communication #Strategy #InvestorRelations #BusinessLanguage #CEOInsights

cheer up, george

A pilot once told us a story about an accident on an early morning flight in the 1950s. As the aircraft accelerated to take off, the captain noticed his flight engineer’s sullen expression and called out, “Cheer up, George.” But in his sleepy state, what the engineer heard was, “Gear up, George” — and he duly raised the landing gear — prematurely as they were not quite airborne. The aircraft sank onto its fuselage and slid to a halt, causing much damage. Luckily, nobody was hurt.

The story illustrates an important point: miscommunication and misunderstanding are both much more likely when context is unclear or not shared. Had George known that the topic of conversation was his mood rather than the flying of the plane, he would have been less likely to misunderstand what his captain was communicating to him, and he most certainly would not have acted the way he did.

Constantinos C. Markides and Andrew MacLennan

"3 Ways to Clearly Communicate Your Company’s Strategy," Harvard Business Review. May 24, 2024

after just 10 minutes

A recent Finnish study of 380 virtual work meetings showed that remote viewers reported feeling drowsy (and some nearly fell asleep) after just 10 minutes...

The study reinforces another experiment that University of Washington biology professor John Medina conducts with his students every year, which reaches the same conclusion.

Medina says, "After 9 minutes and 59 seconds, the audience's attention is getting ready to plummet to near zero."

Carmine Gallo

Scientists Pinpoint the Exact Moment People Loose Interest in a Presentation: Three ways to keep your audience engaged beyond this cliff. Inc. Feb. 27, 2024

it took constant communication

Alison: Talk about navigating the Covid-19 crisis and racial reckoning. How did you work with the players, the teams, and NBA management on that?

Chris: That could be a book in itself. Once again, it took constant communication. During the shutdown, I was on Zooms every day with Adam Silver and others trying to figure out how to get the season going again from scratch: where to play, what the locker rooms would look like, even the messaging on the court. The NBA has 450 players, including some of the most recognizable people in the world. They’re not always going to have the same beliefs or be on the same page. But everyone just wants to be able to have an opinion and be heard and taken seriously. That’s what we did through it all, and everything was voted upon. My leadership style was always to overcommunicate, let everybody share their insights, and then talk about where we wanted to go. After George Floyd, we went to the [biosecure] bubble to keep playing and tried to raise awareness. Then the Jacob Blake shooting [by police] happened. So we got all the players in a room and decided to stop games for a day. Usually in the NBA, after you play a game against someone, you say, “Hey man, everything good with you?” “Yeah, all good.” “All right, y’all have a good rest of the season.” But in the bubble we got a chance to really spend time together, look each other in the eyes, and figure out how we all could be better.

Alison Beard

Life's Work: An Interview with Chris Paul. Harvard Business Review. September-October 2023.

learn about different personalities

Alison: You've played on many teams. How has your approach to leadership evolved with each move? 

Chris: It continually changes. In New Orleans I was crazy in my intensity on the court, wanting everyone to approach the game like I did and trying to make sure I got the best out of them. Later, in Houston, maybe my 13th year in the league, a coach told me that the biggest challenge I have is playing with guys who don’t care as much as I do. Going from team to team, you learn about different personalities and understand that while maybe you can get on this guy, you can’t get on that one. I haven’t always been perfect. Sometimes you don’t have a lot of time to figure out how to communicate with a teammate. But I always at least try with the right intention.

Alison Beard

Life's Work: An Interview with Chris Paul. Harvard Business Review. September-October 2023.

Here there is no committee meeting

If there is one rule to remember about work meetings, it might be that they are a necessary evil. They are necessary insofar as organizations need them for proper communication, but they are evil in that they are almost never inherently desirable, and should thus be used as sparingly as possible for the sake of productivity and happiness.

Under ideal circumstances, meetings would be unnecessary. But circumstances are never ideal, at least on this mortal coil—which, come to think of it, might give us something to look forward to in the afterlife. As the poet Edgar Albert Guest wrote in 1920,

When over me the night shall fall,

And my poor soul goes upwards winging

Unto that heavenly realm, where all

Is bright with joy and gay with singing,

I hope to hear St. Peter say,

And I shall thank him for the greeting:

“Come in and rest from day to day;

Here there is no committee meeting!”

Arthur C. Brooks

"Meetings are Miserable," The Atlantic. November 17, 2022

organizations launching multiple change programs

What should organizations launching multiple change programs do differently? First and foremost, they should take the holistic view. The top management team (TMT) orchestrating change management should draw up a map of all the initiatives, planned or ongoing, occurring within the organization. This map should incorporate all of the vantage points that matter: not only the perspectives of top management, but also those of middle management and front-line employees. Middle managers and employees may perceive inconsistencies among these change initiatives more clearly than TMTs can, and they may well offer practical ideas about how to address inconsistencies upfront.

Once the organization has mapped out all employees’ perceptions of inconsistency in various initiatives, it should consider how to address these inconsistencies from the start. TMTs can stay ahead of the game by preparing a clear, consistent communication narrative explaining the necessity for multiple initiatives as opposed to one, detailing exactly how they fit together. Such a narrative can preempt the perception of inconsistency on all three levels: content, procedure, and normative expectations.

The timing and pacing of each initiative are additional key considerations. TMTs should have a clear idea of which initiatives can be wrapped up quickly and which may take years — and when to launch or stop each one. With a clearer time frame, they can ward off inconsistency by ensuring, for example, that one team isn’t assigned two conflicting tasks at the same time or that teams aren’t saddled with a storm of changes that could overwhelm their capacity.

TMTs should also monitor whether each key initiative has been allocated adequate resources. Remember that strategic change is exhausting, and periods of high activity should be followed by intervals of rest or less-intense work. The alternative to careful timing may well be burnout, which is an even greater threat to change performance than inconsistency.

Ultimately, successful change managers shift their focus from single initiatives to the dynamics among multiple initiatives. A successful transformation typically does not rely on any single change initiative but emerges from the careful management of multiple, integrated initiatives that interact and reinforce one another over time. One key success factor is to be alert to emerging inconsistencies among various initiatives regarding content, procedures, and normative expectations. These emerging inconsistencies can cause initial supporters to resist change, ultimately undermining the initiatives. Instead, taking the deliberate, comprehensive approach described here can drive your success in leading change.

Quy Nguyen Huy, Rouven Kanitz, Julia Backmann, and Martin Hoegl

"How to Reduce the Risk of Colliding Change Initiatives," MITSloan Management Review. June 3, 2021

open-source change management

Open-source change management embraces employees as active participants in change planning and implementation. It requires three shifts in thinking:

• Involve employees in decision-making. This isn’t about allowing employees to vote on every change; it means finding ways to infuse the voice of those most impacted into your planning. Gartner research has found that this step alone can increase your change success by 15%. It makes change management a meritocracy, where you increase the odds that the best ideas and inputs are included in decision-making.
• Shift implementation planning to employees. Leaders often don’t have enough visibility into the daily workflows of their teams to dictate a successful change approach. And leaving the workforce out of change implementation can increase resistance and failure. Gartner research has found that when employees own implementation planning, change success increases by 24%.
• Engage in two-way conversations throughout the change process. Instead of focusing on how you’ll sell the change to employees, think of communications as a way to surface employee reactions. Holding regular, honest conversations about the change will allow employees to share their questions and opinions, which will drive understanding and make them feel like they’re part of the commitment to change. Gartner research has found that this step can increase change success by 32%.

Cian O Morain and Peter Aykens

"Employees Are Losing Patience with Change Initiatives," Harvard Business Review. May 9, 2023

prioritized change

Prioritized change means leaders show employees where to invest their energy by communicating their backlog of priorities, including change initiatives. Without such guidance, employees are likely to give 110% for each change, resulting in a blowout.

Many leadership teams already rank the most important organizational projects and initiatives, but that knowledge often isn’t shared beyond leadership team discussions. Communicating this more broadly can help teams more effectively manage their energy and efforts.

Cian O Morain and Peter Aykens

"Employees Are Losing Patience with Change Initiatives," Harvard Business Review. May 9, 2023

things truly confident people say

Here are the kinds of things you'll hear truly confident people say.

1. "I wouldn't worry about it."

Go to a confident friend with a list of "what-ifs" or reasons why something may turn out badly and you'll likely hear this kind of reassurance. It's because confident people generally don't worry. They understand that even if something goes wrong, they can handle it. It's the persistent feeling that regardless of what happens--good or bad--they will cope.

2. "Go for it."

Along with a lack of anxiety comes a sense of optimism. Truly confident people expect good things to happen. At the same time, their track record of making good decisions means they also possess the ability to temper their positivity with realistic thinking.

3. "Doing it this way works for me."

Confident individuals don't feel compelled to conform to gain acceptance from others. This is the central beauty of confidence--the calm self-assurance that makes others want to follow.

4. "Why not me?"

Instead of waiting around for the next opportunity, confident people seek it out. Maybe it's building the right relationships, asking for a promotion or otherwise taking a leap of faith. These people have a vision for the future and chart their own path to get there.   

5. "I need to say something."

Confident people take a stand when it comes to matters of right and wrong yet possess the wisdom to understand which battles are worth fighting. That said, they'll back down graciously if proved wrong, because they're secure enough to consider viewpoints other than their own.

6. "Tell me more."

Confident people listen far more than they talk, are naturally curious, and express a genuine interest in others. Conversely, those who monopolize conversations or brag (ever) have something to prove and are masking insecurity.

7. "Can you help me?"

Everyone has weaknesses, but the self-assured are not afraid to admit them. Instead of worrying what others will think if they ask for help, confident people are more concerned with self-improvement, gaining valuable skills, and performing a job well. 

Christina Desmarias

"7 Things Confident People Always Say," Inc.com. June 24, 2016

two preferred senders of change messages

Based on Prosci's change management research report with 650 participants, employees prefer two primary senders of change messages. Not surprisingly, they also prefer specific message content from each of these senders. Immediate supervisors are the preferred senders of messages related to personal impact including:

• How does this impact me? 
• How does this impact our group?
• How will this change my day-to-day responsibilities?

When it comes to personal issues, receivers want to hear from someone they know and work with regularly, namely their supervisor. 

CROs or executive leaders are the preferred senders of messages related to business issues and opportunities including: 

• What are the business reasons for this change?
• How does this change align with our vision and strategy? 
• What are the risks if we do not change?

When it comes to business issues and why the change is needed, receivers want to hear from the person in charge. 

Jeffrey M. Hiatt & Timothy J. Creasey

Change Management: The People Side of Change, by Jeffrey M. Hiatt & Timothy J. Creasey Prosci Inc. 2012. P.18, 19

mirrored reciprocation

Peter Kaufman, editor of Poor Charlie's Almanak, wanted to understand "how everything in the world works." Normally, such a lofty goal would be overwhelming, even laughable. Most of us would give up such a quest before it had even begun. So he found a short-cut. Over a six-month period, he read the condensed interview at the end of every copy of Discover magazine ever published online: 144 interviews in all. Each was a short but high-quality summary of some aspect of science, written for a lay audience, with clear examples, engaging stories, and concise language. 

He soon found he could separate everything he was learning into three buckets of data. bucket one was the oldest and largest data set: the inorganic universe. It was physics and geology, covering the more than thirteen billion years since the dawn of the universe. bucket two was biology, everything alive on planet Earth. That covered about three billion years. Bucket three was the whole of human history: the relatively short period we have been around as a species. 

Then he looked for commonalities: principles that could explain how things worked consistently, across all three buckets. 

In bucket one he found Newton's Third Law of Motion: for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction. In other words, the more force you exert on something, the more force that thing exerts back. In bucket two he found Mark Twain's example of what happens if you pick up a cat by its tail: it will attack you. In bucket 3 he found something similar: how we treat other people is how they will treat us back. 

The commonality was a principle that he dubbed "mirrored reciprocation," or, in simpler terms, "You get what you give." Just think of all the ways we can apply that principle! Send a thank-you note, and you will get one back. Smile sincerely at someone, and they will smile back at you. Offer information to someone in a conversation, and they will tend to share information with you in return. 

In one experiment investigating the principle of mirrored reciprocation, a researcher sent handwritten Christmas cards to almost six hundred complete strangers. Each card included a not and a photograph of his family. It didn't take long before these complete strangers started sending responses. In all he received close to two hundred cards in reply.

Greg McKeown

Effortless: Make it Easier to do what Matters Most. By Greg McKeown. Random House. 2021. p. 157, 158. See also "The Multidisciplinary Approach to Thinking" by Peter Kaufman. 

just talk about your business

A tiny but pivotal moment in IBM's legendary turnaround reveals a better approach. Lou Gerstner was new to his post as CEO and had invited Nick Donofrio, one of his executive leaders, to speak at a state-of-the-company meeting. Gerstner recalls, "At that time, the standard format of any important IBM meeting was a presentation using overhead projectors and graphics on transparencies that IBMers called - and no one remembers why - 'foils.' Nick was on his second foil when I stepped to the table and, as politely as I could in front of his team, switched off the projector. After a long moment of awkward silence, I simply said, 'Let's just talk about your business.'"

That's what the goal for most presentations is supposed to be: to "just talk about your business." So the next time you have to write a report, give a presentation, or make a sales pitch, resist the temptation to add unnecessary extras. They aren't just a distraction for you; they're also a distraction for your audience. That's why, when I do presentations, I use six slides, with fewer than ten words total. 

There is rarely a need to go that second mile beyond what's essential. It's better to go just the first mile than to not go anywhere at all.

Greg McKeown

Effortless: Make it Easier to do what Matters Most. Random House. 2021. p. 120, 121

get inside their minds

Practice really hearing what people say. Do your best to get inside their minds.

Marcus Aurelius

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. Modern Library. 2003. P.81, Book 6, #53 Also see The Internet Classics Archive | The Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (mit.edu)

hook your audience with one sentence

[James] Patterson spends a lot of time writing the first lines of every chapter. That’s the opportunity to hook the audience. For example, the first sentence of Kiss the Girls, the second in the Alex Cross series of novels, reads:

For three weeks, the young killer actually lived inside the walls of an extraordinary fifteen-room beach house.

A lot of thought (and rewriting) goes into crafting a sentence like that. The purpose is to entice the reader to lean in, so they’re quickly invested in the story.

First lines are also crucial for speeches and presentations. Avoid starting a presentation with a long, tedious agenda of what you plan to cover. Instead, hook your audience with one sentence that draws them in.

In 2007 Steve Jobs kicked off the 90-minute iPhone presentation with the line, “Today Apple is going to reinvent the phone.” I was watching and I was hooked. I wanted the mystery to be solved: How was Apple going to reinvent it? What would it look like? What features will it have? How is it different than my Blackberry? How much will it cost, and when can I buy it?”

Carmine Gallo

"James Patterson’s Storytelling Tips For Leaders," Forbes. August 10, 2022

we do not listen to understand

Think about it, the word listen and the word silent are spelled with the same letters.

In order to be a good listener, we first need to learn how to be silent.

That includes, not thinking about how you’re going to reply when another person is talking.

“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply,” Stephen Covey.

Even though you might have a lot to say, sometimes it’s best not to respond.

In silence, without distractions, that’s when people feel respected and appreciated.

Emily Rice

"Listen to Understand not to Reply," Norhart Blog. January 18, 2019