we did this ourselves

A leader is best when people barely know that he exists, not so good when people obey and acclaim him, worst when they despise him. Fail to honor people, They fail to honor you. But of a good leader, who talks little, when his work is done, his aims fulfilled, they will all say, "We did this ourselves."

老子 Lǎozi 

Tao Te Ching, late 4th century BC. Chapter 17. 

a nudge

A nudge is an intervention that maintains freedom of choice but steers people in a particular direction. A tax isn’t a nudge. A subsidy isn’t a nudge. A mandate isn’t a nudge. And a ban isn’t a nudge. A warning is a nudge: “If you swim at this beach, the current is high, and it might be dangerous.” You’re being nudged not to swim, but you can. When you’re given information about the number of fat calories in a cheeseburger, that is a nudge. If a utility company sends something two days before a bill is due, saying that “You should pay now, or you are going to incur a late fee,” that is a nudge. You can say no, but it’s probably not in your best interest to do so. Nudges help people deal with a fact about the human brain—which is that we have limited attention. The number of things that we can devote attention to in a day or an hour or a year is lower than the number of things we should devote attention to. A nudge can get us to pay attention.

Cass Sunstein

"Much anew about ‘nudging’," by Roberta Fusaro and Julia Sperling-Magro. mckinsey.com. August 6, 2021. 

priming

For humans, exposure to one stimulus influences how a person responds to a related stimulus later. Our brains are adapted to process information more readily after being exposed to something related. We can use this in change management by developing an all-pervasive culture around the change in question using multiple, frequent and small stimuli related to the change. That might generate propensity to process the change more readily as the project progresses. And research tells us that the use of images, taglines, mission statements, posters, logos, images and branding are all great ways to achieve priming.

Al Lee-Bourke

10 Tips From Psychology Every Change Leader Should Know by Al Lee-Bourke. Prosci Blog. Accessed on August 4, 2022. 

life is not fair

Life is not fair. If you think it is, you are sorely mistaken. What you've got to do in politics is be sure that what you say can be justified by principle, by argument, and to put it across. As I always say, never follow the crowd. Make up your own mind and get the crowd to follow you. 

Margaret Thatcher

The Loudest Duck: Moving Beyond Diversity While Embracing Differences to Achieve Success at Work by Laura A. Liswood. Wiley. 2010. p.125

verbal judo

Verbal Judo is a means of using language to get someone to comply voluntarily with your original request. Unpleasant confrontations are more likely to occur if an officer talks, without conscious thought, to someone on the street. "Stop doing what you are doing!" Get over here now! Stay calm and be reasonable!" These are all natural ways to speak in a tense and difficult situation. However, by using a demanding voice or loaded words, you may only further escalate the tension, which could result in violence.

It's no wonder, then, that an individual who has been yelled at by a police officer would turn around and start cursing at the officer, even making derogatory remarks about the officer's mother. Once riled up, they may start moving around in unpredictable and threatening ways. Once someone starts acting or speaking abnormally or becomes threatening, we've been instructed on how to use an appropriate level of force when justified, even up to nonlethal weapons like pepper spray or a baton if the circumstances move to that level. I've been pepper sprayed at the police academy, and it's simply not pleasant. Anything we can do to avoid this or the use of any weapon is certainly preferable. 

So we learned how to avoid this unconscious kind of speaking by relying on Verbal Judo, which seeks voluntary compliance through a deliberate way of speaking that's actually quite unnatural to most of us. For example, we were instructed to say, "For your safety and mine, you need to stop doing what you are doing." Depending on the situation, we may say, "Is there anything else I can say or do to get you to do A, B, or C?" or, "I would like to help you here, so let's talk through what just happened." We were also taught to give people options. "You can stop doing what you're doing, or here is another option: I will put you in this police car, take you to the station, and book you. You will probably miss work tomorrow. Or remember the other option - you can stop doing what you are doing." These are more engaging, less threatening methods of interacting, but they definitely take practice and deliberate, conscious thought.

Laura A. Liswood

The Loudest Duck: Moving Beyond Diversity While Embracing Differences to Achieve Success at Work by Laura A. Liswood. Wiley. 2010. p.115, 116

how we can be more helpful to others

A little knowledge can be a dangerous thing. You can use this material to blame just as well as you can use anything else. Merely knowing the material doesn't get you out of the box. Living it does. And we're not living it if we're using it to diagnose others. Rather, we're living it when we're using it to learn how we can be more helpful to others...

Knowing the material

• Self-betrayal leads to self-deception and "the box."
• When you're in the box, you can't focus on results.
• Your influence and success will depend on being out of the box.
• You get out of the box as you cease resisting other people.

Living the material

• Don't try to be perfect. Do try to be better.
• Don't use the vocabulary - "the box," and so on - with people who don't already know it. Do use the principles in your own life.
• Don't look for others' boxes. Do look for your own.
• Don't accuse others of being in the box. Do try to stay out of the box yourself.
• Don't give up on yourself when you discover you've been in the box. Do keep trying.
• Don't deny you've been in the box when you have been. Do apologize, then just keep marching forward, trying to be more helpful to others in the future. 
• Don't focus on what others are doing wrong. Do focus on what you can do right to help.
• Don't worry whether others are helping you. Do worry whether you are helping others.

Leadership and Self-deception: Getting Out of the Box by Arbinger Institute. Berrett-Koehler. 2002. p.165,166

leadership that pulls

For fourteen years, my father conducted one of the country’s leading amateur Bach choirs in Bethlehem, Pennsylvania. For a few of those years, I played in the orchestra and had the opportunity to watch his work up close.

My father’s voice was so soft it was often hard to hear in normal conversation, and on a crowded stage, practically impossible. Yet I noticed that when he spoke during rehearsals, not a single musician ever missed a word. Why not? Because when he began speaking, they would grow so quiet a dropped pin would have sounded like the cannonfire in the 1812 Overture.

He would speak — and everyone would lean in, craning to hear his every word.

He pulled them in.

I saw the most cynical, don’t-tell-me New York union musicians turn into putty when my father made a suggestion to start this passage with an up-bow, or to take that passage sotto voce so we could more clearly hear the tenors. People would turn themselves inside out to follow him — and they would follow him anywhere.

There were two reasons for this. First was that he was superb at what he did. He knew this music inside and out; it was in his bones; it was his life.

And second? He treated them with absolute respect. He didn’t tell them what to do; he collaborated with them…

Take an ordinary window fan and place it in a window, blowing inward. Switch it on. How far can you push a column of air into the room? Not far: within a few feet it starts doubling back on itself. But now, reverse the fan’s position so that it is blowing out — and you can pull that column of air all the way from a single open window clear on the other side of the house, even hundreds of feet away.

There is leadership that pushes. And there is leadership that pulls.

How far can you push people? Only so far. How far can you pull them? An awfully long way, if your leadership style embraces total respect for those you lead as its foundation.

When that second kind of leadership speaks — even when in a voice as soft as my father’s — people listen, because they feel valued, and because of that, they trust.

That kind of leadership, we’ll follow anywhere.

John David Mann

"Leadership That Pulls," Huffpost. April 30, 2016

A.D.K.A.R.

 

Awareness represents a person's understanding of the nature of change, why the change is being made and the risk of not changing. Awareness also includes information about the internal and external drivers that created the need for change, as well as "what's in it for me."

Desire represents the willingness to support and engage in a change. Desire is ultimately about personal choice, influenced by the nature of the change, by an individual's personal situation, as well as intrinsic motivators that are unique to each person.

Knowledge represents the information, training and education necessary to know how to change. Knowledge includes information about behaviors, processes, tools, systems, skills, job roles and techniques that are needed to implement a change. 

Ability represents the realization or execution of the change. Ability is turning knowledge into action. Ability is achieved when a person or group has demonstrated capability to implement the change at the required performance levels.

Reinforcement represents those internal and external factors that sustain a change. External reinforcements could include recognition, rewards and celebrations that are tied to the realization of the change. Internal reinforcements could be a person's internal satisfaction with his or her achievement or other benefits derived from the change on a personal level.

Jeffrey M. Hiatt

ADKAR: A Model for Change in Business, Government and our Community. 2006. Prosci Research. p.2,3

all politics is personal

I believe all politics is personal, because at bottom, politics depends on trust, and unless you can establish a personal relationship, it's awfully hard to build trust.... I have always followed my father's advice: Never tell a man what his interests are. Be straight and open with him about your own interests. And try to put yourself in his shoes. Try to understand his hopes and his limitations, and never insist that he do something you know he cannot. It's really just about making the effort to make a personal connection.

Joe Biden

Promise Me, Dad: A Year of Hope, Hardship, and Purpose. By Joe Biden. Flatiron Books. 2017. Preface. 129

done you a kindness

He that has once done you a kindness will be more ready to do you another than he whom you yourself have obliged. 

Benjamin Franklin 

Autobiography and Other Writings by Benjamin Franklin, edited by Russel B. Nye. 1949. p.94

humble people

There's an allure about humble people. They exude greater power, influence and persuasion than their overly-talkative brethren because, well, nobody likes hearing the same voice time and again. If you're compelled to speak for fear of not being heard otherwise, then the greater question is “Why does that fear exist?” There needs to be a firm foundation of trust to be heard so everybody knows their best interests are held. Without trust, the tendency is to shy away from we and instead focus on me. Not ideal.

Jeff Boss

"These Leadership Lessons From The SEAL Teams Are Universal For Any Industry" Forbes. Mar. 2, 2017

we did it ourselves

A leader is best when people barely know he exists, when his work is done, his aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.

Lao Tzu

"50 Inspiring Quotes on Leadership for Everyone" Time. July 1, 2015

everyone is important

Feeling entirely at home with persons of high or lowly rank [George Albert Smith] rejected the idea of class distinctions. When his friends urged him to meet someone because he was ‘a very important person’, George had a standard reply. “Of course he is,” he would say, “Everyone is important. I don’t think you can classify human beings on the basis of their importance. Some people may be more influential than others; some may be more capable, some more prominent, and some may have greater responsibilities than others, but no one is more important than anyone else.”

Against the Odds: The Life of George Albert Smith by Mary Jane Woodger. 2011. Covenant Communications.

four characteristics of the transformational leader

Transformational leaders exhibit four characteristics in their interactions with employees; idealized influence, inspirational motivation, intellectual stimulation, and individualized consideration.

Transformational Leaders

• Charisma: Provides vision and sense of mission, instills pride, gains respect and trust. 
• Inspiration: Communicates high expectations, uses symbols to focus efforts, expresses important purposes in simple ways.
• Intellectual stimulation: Promotes intennigence, rationality, and careful problem solving. 
• Individualized Consideration: Gives personal atention, treats each employee individually, coaches, advises. 

Transactional Leaders

• Contingent Reward: Contracts exchange of rewards for effort, promises rewards for good performance, recognizes accomplishments.
• Management by Exception (active): Watches and searches for deviations from rules and standards, takes corrective action.
• Management by Exception (passive): Intervenes only if standards are not met. 
• Lasissez-Faire: Abdicates responsibilities, avoids making decisions. 

Bernard M. Bass

"From transactional to transformational leadership. Learning to share the vision." by B.M. Bass.  Organizational dynamics.  Winter 1990.  As quoted by "Phoebe Hayman, the founder of Seedling, Talks About Leadership as a Support Role" by Ramon B. Nuez Jr. Huffington Post. August 28, 2017.

the collective voice

[I]magine you’ve got a problem that feels too risky or futile for anyone on your team to speak up about individually. Perhaps it’s about a business policy or process that your boss is wedded to or can’t change himself anyway, or perhaps it’s a problem with your manager’s own behavior or performance. This is often where silence prevails. We found in our interviews, though, that sometimes people did well when they banded together to speak up collectively. In some cases, it involved talking as a group to their direct boss (for instance, at a weekly meeting) or finding an opportunity to approach a skip-level boss together; in others, it involved scheduling a series of one-on-one meetings (because it was hard to get everyone free at the same time) and being sure to use “we” language in those meetings.

We heard about “collective voice” episodes in about one-third of our interviews and, to our initial surprise, learned that the participants considered the outcomes positive in every case. Upon reflection, we understand that this success stemmed from their ability to both reduce the risks and increase their efficacy in speaking up. People noted explicitly that there is “strength in numbers” and that it “felt a lot safer to approach the manager together.” And they pointed out that they were less likely to “be written off as one disgruntled person” once the boss saw they were raising a systemic issue. They recognized the potency of solidarity and benefited from what scholars call “social proof,” the influence that comes from seeing others committed to a course of action. Collective voice was also more likely than individual voice to lead to action because the necessary coordination and buy-in needed from colleagues to solve certain problems had already been obtained by the time the boss was approached.

James R. Detert and Ethan R. Burris

"When It’s Tough to Speak Up, Get Help from Your Coworkers" Harvard Business Review. 3/4/2016

providing purpose, direction, and motivation

Leadership is the process of influencing people by providing purpose, direction, and motivation to accomplish the mission and improve the organization (ADP 6-22)...

Influencing is getting people... to do what is required. Influencing entails more than simply passing along orders. Through words and personal example, leaders communicate purpose, direction and motivation.

Purpose gives subordinates the reason to achieve a desired outcome. Leaders should provide clear purpose for their followers...

Providing clear Direction involves communicating what to do to accomplish a mission: prioritizing tasks, assigning responsibility for completion, and ensuring subordinates understand the standard. Although subordinates want and need direction, they expect challenging tasks, quality training and adequate resources. They should have appropriate freedom of action. Providing clear direction allows followers to adapt to changing circumstances through modifying plans and orders through disciplined initiative...

Motivation supplies the will and initiative to do what is necessary to accomplish a mission. Motivation comes from within, but others' actions and words affect it. A leader's role in motivation is to understand the needs and desires of others, to align and elevate individual desires into team goals and to inspire others to accomplish those larger goals. Some people have high levels of internal motivation to get a job done, while others need more reassurance, positive reinforcement, and feedback...

Improving for the future means capturing and acting on important lessons of ongoing and completed projects and missions. Improving is an act of stewardship, striving to create effective, efficient organizations...

Headquarters, Department of the Army

ARMY LEADERSHIP (INCL C1) 6-22. Army Doctrine and Training Publications. 8/1/2012

understanding habits

"Understanding habits is the most important thing I’ve learned in the army,” the major told me. “It’s changed everything about how I see the world. You want to fall asleep fast and wake up feeling good? Pay attention to your nighttime patterns and what you automatically do when you get up. You want to make running easy? Create triggers to make it a routine. I drill my kids on this stuff. My wife and I write out habit plans for our marriage. This is all we talk about in command meetings. Not one person in Kufa would have told me that we could influence crowds by taking away the kebab stands, but once you see everything as a bunch of habits, it’s like someone gave you a flashlight and a crowbar and you can get to work.

Charles Duhigg

The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business. Random House. 2012.

leadership is not a position

Real leadership requires personal influence -- persuasion afforded by a long track record of strong relationships built by trust. That reserve of trust may have been built by any number of things:

• Direct, clear communication without intention to deceive
• Consistency- actions that match your words
• Transparency and openness
• Explanations about goals and decisions
• A private life that matches the public life
• Competence
• Concern and compassion for others
• An upbeat, positive attitude about the future

When others observe these attitudes in a leader, the personal influence compels them to listen with an open mind -- and often to accept the leader's ideas and opinions as their own.

When the personal influence is missing, a positional title often demands little more than a "hearing" -- often met with open skepticism.

Dianna Booher 

"3 Things Leadership Is NOT" Huffington Post. 9/22/15

can anyone be a leader?

Leadership is a skill, and I believe like all skills, can be mastered with practice and coaching. That does not mean that there aren’t individual differences, but that people can improve on their current capabilities.

One of the reasons why leadership training so often fails—Bill Gentry of the Center for Creative Leadership estimates that about half of all leaders are ineffective in their roles—is that leadership education insufficiently focuses on building the influence skills and acumen in managing organizational dynamics—organizational politics, if you will—that are so essential to getting things done on the one hand and surviving and succeeding in workplaces on the other.

Jeffrey Pfeffer

"Jeffrey Pfeffer: What Most People Don't Know About Leadership." Forbes. 9/15/2015

fit his message to his audience

“[E.D.] Morel has never had an equal as organizer and leader of a Dissenting movement,” writes the historian A.J.P. Taylor. “He knew exactly where to look for rich sympathizers; and he took money from them without altering the democratic character of [his movement]. Millionaires and factory workers alike accepted his leadership.” Among the millionaires were Quakers like the wealthy but plain-living chocolate manufacturer William Cadbury. Subsidies from these supporters kept the West African Mail alive, and it was the newspaper, not the Congo Reform Association, that paid Morel’s salary. Paradoxically, Sir Alfred Jones of the Elder Dempster line also invested a little money in the paper, doubtless hoping to soften the attitude of his former employee. But his hopes were in vain; Morel repeatedly attacked Jones without mercy, exposing his doings as Leopold’s major British ally. When Jones saw he would have no influence, he pulled his advertising from the paper.

Morel knew exactly how to fit his message to his audience. He reminded British businessmen that Leopold’s monopolistic system,  copied by France, had shut them out of much Congo trade. To members of the clergy he talked of Christian responsibility and quoted the grim reports from the missionaries. And for all Britons, and their representatives in Parliament, he evoked the widespread though unspoken belief that England had a particular responsibility to make decency prevail in the universe.

Adam Hochschild

King Leopold's Ghost: A Story of Greed, Terror, and Heroism in Colonial Africa - Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, Sep 3, 1999.