cheer up, george

A pilot once told us a story about an accident on an early morning flight in the 1950s. As the aircraft accelerated to take off, the captain noticed his flight engineer’s sullen expression and called out, “Cheer up, George.” But in his sleepy state, what the engineer heard was, “Gear up, George” — and he duly raised the landing gear — prematurely as they were not quite airborne. The aircraft sank onto its fuselage and slid to a halt, causing much damage. Luckily, nobody was hurt.

The story illustrates an important point: miscommunication and misunderstanding are both much more likely when context is unclear or not shared. Had George known that the topic of conversation was his mood rather than the flying of the plane, he would have been less likely to misunderstand what his captain was communicating to him, and he most certainly would not have acted the way he did.

Constantinos C. Markides and Andrew MacLennan

"3 Ways to Clearly Communicate Your Company’s Strategy," Harvard Business Review. May 24, 2024

the personal connection

The personal connection is especially critical when a leader starts something new. The business world is full of failed initiatives. Good, important ideas get launched with much fanfare. but six months or a year later they're dead in the water and abandoned as unworkable. Why? Down in the organization, the managers feel that the last thing they need is one more time-consuming project of uncertain merit and outcome, so they blow it off. "This too will pass," they say. "just like the last bright idea of the month." Result: the company wastes time, money and energy, and the leader loses credibility, usually without realizing that the failure is a personal indictment. 

The leader's personal involvement, understanding, and commitment are necessary to overcome this passive (or in many cases active) resistance. She not only has to announce the initiative, but to define it clearly and define its importance to the organization. She can't do this unless she understands how it will work and what it really means in terms of benefit. Then she has to follow through to make sure everyone takes it seriously. Again, she can't do this if she can't understand the problems that come with implementation, talk about them with the people doing the implementing, and make clear - again and again - that she expects them to execute it. 

Larry Bossidy

Execution: The Discipline of Getting Things Done by Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan with Charles Burck. 2002. Crown Business, NY, NY. p. 65

only the leader can make execution happen

An organization can execute only if the leader's heart and soul are immersed in the company. Leading is more than thinking big, or schmoozing with investors and lawmakers, although those are part of the job. The leader has to be engaged personally and deeply in the business. Execution requires a comprehensive understanding of a business, its people, and its environment. The leader is the only person in a position to achieve that understanding. And only the leader can make execution happen, through his or her deep personal involvement in the substance and even the details of execution.

The leader must be in charge of getting things done by running the three core processes - picking other leaders, setting the strategic direction, and conducting operations. These actions are the substance of execution, and leaders cannot delegate them regardless of the size of the organization.

How good would a sports team be if the coach spent all of his time in his office making deals for new players, while delegating actual coaching to an assistant? A coach is effective because he's constantly observing players individually and collectively on the field and in the locker room. That's how he gets to know his players and their capabilities, and how they get firsthand the benefit of his experience, wisdom, and expert feedback.

It's no different for a business leader. Only a leader can ask the tough questions that everyone needs to answer, then manage the process of debating the information and making the right trade-offs. And only the leader who's intimately engaged in the business can know enough to have the comprehensive view and ask the tough incisive questions. 

Only the leader can set the tone of the dialogue in the organization. Dialogue is the core of culture and the basic unit of work. How people talk to each other absolutely determines how well the organization will function. Is the dialogue stilted, politicized, fragmented, and butt-covering? Or is it candid and reality-based, raising the right questions, debating them, and finding realistic solutions? If it's the former - as it is in all too many companies - reality will never come to the surface. If it is to be the latter, the leader has to be on the playing field with his management team, practicing it consistently and forcefully. 

Specifically, the leader has to run the three core processes and has to run them with intensity and rigor. 

Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan 

Execution: The Discipline of Getting Things Done by Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan with Charles Burck. 2002. Crown Business, NY, NY. p. 24, 25

show up big

If love is missing? Be that. If connection is absent? Be that. If it's understanding, friendship, or acceptance that's needed, it's time for you to show up big.

Gary John Bishop

Unfu*k Yourself 2023 Day-to-Day Calendar: Get Out of Your Head and Into Your Life. September 21

learn about different personalities

Alison: You've played on many teams. How has your approach to leadership evolved with each move? 

Chris: It continually changes. In New Orleans I was crazy in my intensity on the court, wanting everyone to approach the game like I did and trying to make sure I got the best out of them. Later, in Houston, maybe my 13th year in the league, a coach told me that the biggest challenge I have is playing with guys who don’t care as much as I do. Going from team to team, you learn about different personalities and understand that while maybe you can get on this guy, you can’t get on that one. I haven’t always been perfect. Sometimes you don’t have a lot of time to figure out how to communicate with a teammate. But I always at least try with the right intention.

Alison Beard

Life's Work: An Interview with Chris Paul. Harvard Business Review. September-October 2023.

just talk about your business

A tiny but pivotal moment in IBM's legendary turnaround reveals a better approach. Lou Gerstner was new to his post as CEO and had invited Nick Donofrio, one of his executive leaders, to speak at a state-of-the-company meeting. Gerstner recalls, "At that time, the standard format of any important IBM meeting was a presentation using overhead projectors and graphics on transparencies that IBMers called - and no one remembers why - 'foils.' Nick was on his second foil when I stepped to the table and, as politely as I could in front of his team, switched off the projector. After a long moment of awkward silence, I simply said, 'Let's just talk about your business.'"

That's what the goal for most presentations is supposed to be: to "just talk about your business." So the next time you have to write a report, give a presentation, or make a sales pitch, resist the temptation to add unnecessary extras. They aren't just a distraction for you; they're also a distraction for your audience. That's why, when I do presentations, I use six slides, with fewer than ten words total. 

There is rarely a need to go that second mile beyond what's essential. It's better to go just the first mile than to not go anywhere at all.

Greg McKeown

Effortless: Make it Easier to do what Matters Most. Random House. 2021. p. 120, 121

we do not listen to understand

Think about it, the word listen and the word silent are spelled with the same letters.

In order to be a good listener, we first need to learn how to be silent.

That includes, not thinking about how you’re going to reply when another person is talking.

“The biggest communication problem is we do not listen to understand. We listen to reply,” Stephen Covey.

Even though you might have a lot to say, sometimes it’s best not to respond.

In silence, without distractions, that’s when people feel respected and appreciated.

Emily Rice

"Listen to Understand not to Reply," Norhart Blog. January 18, 2019

how to be less wrong

Have you ever been taught that if you want to understand someone, you need to put yourself in their shoes?

It's a helpful rule of thumb because it reminds us that the way we see the world is not the way other people do. But there is some danger in this approach. 

Here's why.

We are not nearly as good at understanding others' perspectives as we think we are. Of course, sometimes we guess right, but often we guess wrong...

But here's what is surprising to me. 

It seems obvious that asking someone how they feel helps us better understand them. Yet, how many of us choose to guess how other people feel instead of simply asking them? 

 

Don't guess the perspective of another person. Instead, ask them. 

• Ask customers, What is the most valuable thing we do for you? Where could we be better?
• Ask your team to share the friction points of a current project and ask how you can help reduce them. 
• Ask a family member to send you a link to something they would like for Christmas. 

Greg McKeown

"How to Be Less Wrong," One Minute Wednesday. September 21, 2022

everything is a teacher

When we reexamine what we really want, we realize that everything that happens in our lives — every misfortune, every slight, every loss, and also every joy, every surprise, every happy accident — is a teacher, and life is a giant classroom. That’s the foundation of wisdom that spiritual teachers, poets, and philosophers throughout history have given expression to — from the Bible’s “Not a single sparrow can fall to the ground without God knowing it” to Rilke’s “Perhaps all the dragons of our life are princesses, who are only waiting to see us once beautiful and brave.” My favorite expression of wisdom — one that I keep laminated in my wallet — is by Marcus Aurelius: “True understanding is to see the events of life in this way: “You are here for my benefit, though rumor paints you otherwise.” And everything is turned to one’s advantage when he greets a situation like this: You are the very thing I was looking for. Truly whatever arises in life is the right material to bring about your growth and the growth of those around you. This, in a word, is art — and this art called “life” is a practice suitable to both men and gods. Everything contains some special purpose and a hidden blessing; what then could be strange or arduous when all of life is here to greet you like an old and faithful friend?”

Arianna Huffington

"Why We Need Wisdom More Than Ever," by Arianna Huffington. Thrive Global. November 30, 2016. Excerpt from Thrive: The Third Metric to Redefining Success and Creating a Life of Well-Being, Wisdom, and Wonder pp. 116–130. As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.

does your blame help?

"Does your blame help the other person get better?"

..."No, my blame wouldn't help the other person get better."

"In fact," Lou continued, "wouldn't blaming provoke that person to be even worse?"

"Well, yes, I guess it would," I said.

"Well then, is that blame serving some other useful purpose toward helping the company and those in it achieve results? Is there some out-of-the-box purpose that is served by blame?"

I didn't know what to say. The truth was there was no out-of-the-box purpose for my blame...

Bud spoke up. "I know what you're thinking about, Tom. You've had the misfortune of working with someone who was often in the box. And it was a tough experience. But notice, in that kind of a situation, it's quite easy for me to get in the box too because the justification is so easy - the other guy's a jerk! But remember, once I get in the box in response, I actually need the other guy to keep being a jerk so that I'll remain justified in blaming him for being a jerk. And I don't need to do anything more than get in the box toward him to keep inviting him to be that way. My blame keeps inviting the very thing I'm blaming him for. Because in the box, I need problems.

"Isn't it far better,' he continued, "to be able to recognize others' boxes without blaming them for being in the box? After all, I know what it's like to be in the box because I'm there some of the time too. Out of the box I understand what it's like to be in the box. And since when I'm out of the box I neither need nor provoke others to be jerks, I can actually ease, rather than exacerbate, tough situations.

Leadership and Self-deception: Getting Out of the Box by Arbinger Institute. Berrett-Koehler. 2002. p.153, 154

listen to understand

 

A.D.K.A.R.

 

Awareness represents a person's understanding of the nature of change, why the change is being made and the risk of not changing. Awareness also includes information about the internal and external drivers that created the need for change, as well as "what's in it for me."

Desire represents the willingness to support and engage in a change. Desire is ultimately about personal choice, influenced by the nature of the change, by an individual's personal situation, as well as intrinsic motivators that are unique to each person.

Knowledge represents the information, training and education necessary to know how to change. Knowledge includes information about behaviors, processes, tools, systems, skills, job roles and techniques that are needed to implement a change. 

Ability represents the realization or execution of the change. Ability is turning knowledge into action. Ability is achieved when a person or group has demonstrated capability to implement the change at the required performance levels.

Reinforcement represents those internal and external factors that sustain a change. External reinforcements could include recognition, rewards and celebrations that are tied to the realization of the change. Internal reinforcements could be a person's internal satisfaction with his or her achievement or other benefits derived from the change on a personal level.

Jeffrey M. Hiatt

ADKAR: A Model for Change in Business, Government and our Community. 2006. Prosci Research. p.2,3

speak, but don’t listen

[W]hen leaders assume their answer is the answer, they tend to approach change as they would a political campaign — heavy on slogans and focused on numerical targets akin to contributions and votes. The process can feel forced; people are engaged solely to be converted to the leader’s “side,” rather than to participate in a dialogue about the potential implications of the plan. Leaders speak, but don’t listen. Or they assume that a lack of feedback reflects agreement and acceptance among their constituents.

Success under this approach is typically measured by increases in compliance (“40 percent of staff have logged on to the new ERP system”) and decreases in resistance (“the number of employees indicating the new ERP system will help make their work more effective has increased by 30 percent since last quarter”). Leaders reward those who quickly conform, not realizing that these conversions often represent superficial commitments, not true allegiance or even an accurate understanding of the new way. And because hard questions are minimized, teams may comply with a change that won’t work once it gets underway.

For employees, the pressure to change without truly understanding or committing to the initiative is an unfortunate fact of organizational life. People become used to the expectation that they will limit independent thinking and suspend disbelief, regardless of the lessons of their prior experience. If employees have a few questions, that is usually acceptable, but more can invite censure or ridicule, or, in the worst cases, can be career damaging, even if such questions represent legitimate critiques or sound ideas for improvement.

Maya Townsend and Elizabeth Doty

"The road to successful change is lined with trade-offs," strategy+business. November 2, 2020.

profoundly simple

Understanding evolves through three phases: simplistic, complex, and profoundly simple.

William Schutz

As quoted in Beyond Performance 2.0: A Proven Approach to Leading Large-Scale Change. John Wiley & Sons, Inc. 2019 by Scott Keller and Bill Schaninger

provide a vision

In every successful transformation effort that I have seen, the guiding coalition develops a picture of the future that is relatively easy to communicate and appeals to customers, stockholders, and employees. A vision always goes beyond the numbers that are typically found in five-year plans. A vision says something that helps clarify the direction in which an organization needs to move.... A useful rule of thumb: if you can’t communicate the vision to someone in five minutes or less and get a reaction that signifies both understanding and interest, you are not yet done with this phase of the transformation process.

John P. Kotter

"Leading Change: Why Transformation Efforts Fail" Harvard Business Review. May-June 1995

great simplifiers

Great leaders are almost always great simplifiers, who can cut through argument, debate, and doubt to offer a solution everybody can understand.


Colin Powell
"50 Inspiring Quotes on Leadership for Everyone" Time. July 1, 2015

complaining is not a strategy

One of the first rules of business is complaining is not a strategy. You have to work with the world as you find it, not as you would have it be.

Jeff Bezos
"Jeff Bezos has advice for the news business: 'Ask people to pay. They will pay'". CNBC.  June 21, 2017. 

levels of listening

There are different levels of listening. Not every conversation requires the highest levels of listening, but many conversations would benefit from greater focus and listening skill. Consider which level of listening you’d like to aim for:

Level 1: The listener creates a safe environment in which difficult, complex, or emotional issues can be discussed.

Level 2: The listener clears away distractions like phones and laptops, focusing attention on the other person and making appropriate eye-contact.  (This  behavior not only affects how you are perceived as the listener; it immediately influences the listener’s own attitudes and inner feelings.  Acting the part changes how you feel inside. This in turn makes you a better listener.)

Level 3: The listener seeks to understand the substance of what the other person is saying.  They capture ideas, ask questions, and restate issues to confirm that their understanding is correct.

Level 4: The listener observes non-verbal cues, such as facial expressions, perspiration, respiration rates, gestures, posture, and numerous other subtle body language signals.  It is estimated that 80% of what we communicate comes from these signals. It sounds strange to some, but you listen with your eyes as well as your ears.

Level 5: The listener increasingly understands the other person’s emotions and feelings about the topic at hand, and identifies and acknowledges them. The listener empathizes with and validates those feelings in a supportive, nonjudgmental way.

Level 6: The listener asks questions that clarify assumptions the other person holds and helps the other person to see the issue in a new light.  This could include the listener injecting some thoughts and ideas about the topic that could be useful to the other person.  However, good listeners never highjack the conversation so that they or their issues become the subject of the discussion.

Each of the levels builds on the others; thus, if you’ve been criticized (for example) for offering solutions rather than listening, it may mean you need to attend to some of the other levels (such as clearing away distractions or empathizing) before your proffered suggestions can be appreciated.

Jack Zenger and Joseph Folkman

"What Great Listeners Actually Do". Harvard Business Review. July 14, 2016.

don't blame the lettuce

When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don’t blame the lettuce. You look into the reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or our family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and arguments. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change.

Thich Nhat Hanh

Peace is Every Step: The Path of Mindfulness in Everyday Life, Bantam Books. 1992.

primary greatness of character

If you want to have a happy marriage, be the kind of person who generates positive energy and sidesteps negative energy rather than empowering it. If you want to have a more pleasant, cooperative teenager, be a more understanding, empathetic, consistent, loving parent. If you want to have more freedom, more latitude in your job, be a more responsible, a more helpful, a more contributing employee. If you want to be trusted, be trustworthy. If you want the secondary greatness of recognized talent, focus first on primary greatness of character.

Stephen R. Covey

The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change.  Simon & Schuster, 2013