your presence isn't really about you

So let's talk about Taylor Swift and the Super Bowl...

Swift was there, of course. For a while things looked tough for the Chiefs, until they won the game on a last-second touchdown pass in overtime.

Afterward, Swift made her way down to the field, where she reunited with Kelce....

I was curious what they would say to each other... But I also realized that it doesn't matter. What mattered much more is the fact that Swift was there.

Remember, in the days before the Super Bowl, one of the storylines was whether Swift would be able to make it to Las Vegas from Tokyo, where she had a concert Saturday evening, in time for the game...

The trip required Swift to leave immediately after her concert and fly for about 12 hours to Los Angeles, before a one-night stopover and then another hour flight to Las Vegas on Sunday. 

Obviously, Swift wasn't flying in the middle seat on a commercial flight, but it still took a significant effort. And, that effort is a statement...

Sometimes the thing that matters most is that you show up and support the people you care about when they're facing a challenge. 

So, you go to their games and performances. You applaud, you cheer; if they come up short, you're there for them.

You sit in on their presentations, if you're allowed; if not, you make sure to reach out to them and offer encouragement beforehand.

You stand by them in their hours of need. When they've fallen short at something, you tell them you still think they're great, and you believe in them, and they'll do better next time.

When they're sick or they have suffered a loss, you visit them in the hospital; you go to the funeral. 

You understand that your presence isn't really about you; it's about the other person. That's part of why you don't have to say very much sometimes, because being there speaks volumes. 

But if you're not there, you understand as a leader that the opposite is true, too: Your absence would speak volumes. 

Bill Murphy Jr.

"With Literally Zero Words, Taylor Swift Just Taught a Crucial Lesson in Leadership," Inc. Feb 12, 2024

transformation deficit

Business transformation will remain at the forefront in 2023, as organizations continue to refine hybrid ways of working and respond to the urgent need to digitalize, while also contending with inflation, a continuing talent shortage, and supply-chain constraints. These circumstances, which require higher levels of productivity and performance, also mean a lot of change: In 2022, the average employee experienced 10 planned enterprise changes — such as a restructure to achieve efficiencies, a culture transformation to unlock new ways of working, or the replacement of a legacy tech system — up from two in 2016, according to Gartner research.

While more change is coming, the workforce has hit a wall: A Gartner survey revealed that employees’ willingness to support enterprise change collapsed to just 43% in 2022, compared to 74% in 2016.

We call the gap between the required change effort and employee change willingness the “transformation deficit.” Unless functional leaders steer swiftly and expertly, the transformation deficit will stymie organizations’ ambitions and undermine the employee experience, fueling decreased engagement and increased attrition.

Cian O Morain and Peter Aykens

"Employees Are Losing Patience with Change Initiatives," Harvard Business Review. May 9, 2023

grab an oar and row

I don't believe in just ordering people to do things. You have to sort of grab an oar and row with them. My philosophy is to stay as close as possible to what's happening. If I can't solve something, how the hell can I expect my managers to?

Harold Geneen

from an interview for an article in The New York Times (1977), as cited in "Harold S. Geneen, 87, Dies; Nurtured AT&T". Published 23 November 1997 in The New York Times. As found in 2022 Great Quotes from Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes from Leaders Who Shaped the World.

how free was free?

When I took command of Benfold, I realized that no one, including me, is capable of making every decision. I would have to train my people to think and make judgments on their own. Empowering means defining the parameters in which people are allowed to operate, and then setting them free.

But how free was free? What were the limits? 

I chose my line in the sand. Whenever the consequences of a decision had the potential to kill or injure someone, waste taxpayers' money, or damage the ship, I had to be consulted. Short of those contingencies, the crew was authorized to make their own decisions. Even if the decisions were wrong, I would stand by my crew. Hopefully, they would learn from their mistakes. And the more responsibility they were given, the more they learned.

D. Michael Abrashoff

It's Your Ship: Management Techniques from the Best Damn Ship in the Navy by D. Michael Abrashoff. Grand Central Publishing. 2007. p.29,30

creating desire

As a basic principle, managers must first view the task of creating desire as more than managing resistance. Adopting a "resistance management" focus can take a business leader down a trail of reactive management actions that often turn into firefighting and damage control. In other words, you should not introduce a change and then wait to identify those groups or individuals who are resistant to that change. Rather, you should adopt those strategies and tactics that have been used by effective leaders of change that are positive and proactive. Your goal is not to drag along the unwilling and uncaring, with all your attention focused on the minority. Your objective is to create energy and engagement around the change that produces momentum and support at all levels in the organization.

Jeffrey M. Hiatt

ADKAR: A Model for Change in Business, Government and our Community. 2006. Prosci Research. p.79

it takes all types to succeed

McChrystal quotes the leader of a counterterrorism force for whom he worked in the '90s: "Your importance to the mission is not determined by your proximity to the objective." What that means, he explains, is that commandos who go out on a mission do so on the backs of procurement, logistics, HR, and many other functions. Good leaders, he says, point constantly to the contributions that all employees--even at the lowest levels--make to the organization and, by extension, to the leader's success.

Leigh Buchanan
General Stanley McChrystal: Why the Toughest Bosses Have the Most Devoted Employees Inc.com. 23 Oct 2018

heartfelt efforts

In his decade as CEO of Campbell Soup Company, Doug Conant developed rituals for physically and psychologically connecting with people at all levels in the company, which he called touchpoints.

Every morning, Conant allocated a good chunk of his time to walking around the plant, greeting people, and getting to know them. He would memorize their names and the names of their family members. He would take a genuine interest in their lives. He also handwrote letters of gratitude to recognize extraordinary efforts. And when people in the company were having tough times, he wrote them personal messages of encouragement. During his tenure, he sent more than 30,000 such letters.

To Conant, these behaviors were not just strategies to enhance productivity; they were heartfelt efforts to support his people.

Rasmus Hougaard and Jacqueline Carter

"If You Aspire to Be a Great Leader, Be Present" Harvard Business Review. December 13, 2017.

leadership as a support role

Personally, I see leadership as a support role — a listener, a facilitator, a translator, a navigator. I know its common to think of the leader as the visionary, but if you’re a good listener, facilitator, translator and navigator then the leader shares ownership over the vision with the entire team.

Your time to lead is in developing a framework for the team to work within. In order to be successful in executing this shared vision, it’s the leader’s responsibility is to help people understand the role they play and how they can successfully measure their performance. Then you need to take a step back and get out of their way.

Phoebe Hayman

"Phoebe Hayman, the founder of Seedling, Talks About Leadership as a Support Role" by Ramon B. Nuez Jr. Huffington Post. August 28, 2017.

cultivate resilience

According to experts, the following 11 activities help cultivate resilience:

1. Having a core set of beliefs that nothing can shake.
2. Finding meaning in whatever stressful or traumatic thing that has happened.
3. Maintaining a positive outlook.
4. Taking cues from someone else who is especially resilient.
5. Not running away from things that scare you: Face them.
6. Reaching out for support when things go haywire.
7. Learning new things as often as you can.
8. Having an exercise regimen you’ll stick to.
9. Not beating yourself up or dwelling on the past.
10. Recognizing what makes you uniquely strong—and owning it.
11. Practicing mindfulness.

Mindfulness deserves a special mention. In a study, Marines who underwent an eight-week course in mindfulness showed great gains in resilience. No only did their heart rate and breathing rate show less reactivity when faced with a stressful situation, their brains changed too: They showed lower activation in the region of the brain associated with emotional reactions. By the end of training, their brains looked more resilient.


Samantha Boardman M.D.
"Bounce Back: 11 Ways to be More Resilient: Data-driven insights to help deal with stress." Psychology Today. 8/14/2015

be an ally

An ally is someone who has your back, not just on the good days, but on the tough days too. They are the people who cheer you on when things are going well, and provide the tough-love and candid feedback when needed. Your success is dependent on those who work with and for you, and if you want to create a culture of candor and debate, collaboration and teamwork then the time to take action is now.

Morag Barrett

6 steps to great leadership. CIO. 8/10/2015