well-placed pauses

Research suggests that most conversational speech consists of short (0.20 seconds), medium (0.60 seconds), and long (over 1 second) pauses. Great public speakers often pause for two to three seconds or even longer. Our phonetic data shows that the average speaker only uses 3.5 pauses per minute, and that’s not enough.

This is understandable. Pauses aren’t easy to embrace. For many speakers, even the briefest pause can feel like an interminable silence. That’s because we tend to think faster than we speak. According to our research, the average professional speaks at a rate of 150 words per minute. Yet, according to research from Missouri University, we think at 400 words per minute (and depending on who you ask, the rate may be as high as 1,500 words per minute).

Because of this discrepancy, when you’re giving a speech, your perception of time is often distorted, and what feels like an eternity in your mind is actually a few short seconds for the audience.

Despite how they may feel at first, well-placed pauses make you sound calm and collected... Strategically placed silence can build suspense, emphasize a point, or give the audience time to absorb a key insight.

Noah Zandan

How to Stop Saying “Um,” “Ah,” and “You Know” Harvard Business Review. Aug. 1, 2018

be humble and grounded

Ron Nessen, who served as press secretary for President Gerald Ford, shared a story about his boss's leadership style: "He had a dog, Liberty. Liberty has an accident on the rug in the Oval Office and one of the Navy stewards rushes in to clean it up. Jerry Ford says, "I'll do that. No man ought to clean up after another man's dog."

Laszlo Bock

"Work Rules! Insights From Inside Google That Will Transform How You Live and Lead", 2015, Hatchette Book Group, page 126.

the balance between giving and taking

Gauge the balance between giving and taking. Givers offer assistance, share knowledge, and focus on introducing and helping others. Takers attempt to get other people to do something that will ultimately benefit them, while they act as gatekeepers of their own knowledge.

[Adam] Grant’s conclusion is clear: a willingness to help others is not just the essence of effective cooperation and innovation — it is also the key to accelerating your own performance.

Merete Wedell-Wedellsborg

"Help Your Team Do More Without Burning Out" Harvard Business Review. Oct. 15, 2018

calm is contagious

[Commander Rorke T.] Denver told the story of his final training exercise as a Navy SEAL, where students in training have to plan, organize and execute a mission all "under the watchful eye of the lunatic Navy SEAL instructor." His team was behind the clock, and they were in trouble.

He recounts how his ranking officer (also a student in training) was "screaming his head off like the Tasmanian devil," and added, "The fevered pitch level of everyone's behavior was just unsustainable."

Amidst the chaos, the master chief petty officer, the senior ranking enlisted man in the United States Navy — who Denver said is a basic training "god" — came over and told all the officers to gather.

He told them:

"As officers, at a minimum, the boys are going to mimic your behavior. In our line of work, based on our personalities, they're probably going to amplify your behavior, and athletes are the exact same way. As leaders, as captains, as officers, if you keep your head, they'll keep their head. If you keep it together, they'll keep it together. And if you lose it, they'll lose it. 

So I'm going to share with you the best thing I learned as a master chief when I was a new guy from a master chief in Vietnam: Calm is contagious."

And as he walked away, Commander Denver heard him say, "Because if you keep your head in our line of work, you keep your head!"

Catherine Rice

"A former Navy SEAL shares the No. 1 leadership lesson he learned in military training" Business Insider. Feb. 19, 2017

assessing your culture

Ed Schein, now retired from the MIT School of Management, taught that a group's culture can be studied in three ways: by looking at its "artifacts," such as physical space and behaviors; by surveying the beliefs and values espoused by group members; or by digging deeper into the underlying assumptions behind those values.

As Adam Grant of the University of Pennsylvania's Wharton School and it's youngest-ever tenured professor told me: "People interpret strong cultures based on the artifacts because they're the most visible, but the values and assumptions underneath matter much more.""

Laszlo Bock

"Work Rules! Insights From Inside Google That Will Transform How You Live and Lead", 2015, Hatchette Book Group, pages 29-30.