wisdom is missing

Growing up in Athens, I was brought up on the classics and the Greek myths. They were taught to me not as ancient history, as my children learned them in their American classrooms, but as my personal roots and the source of my identity. Athena was the goddess of wisdom, and, for me, the idea of wisdom is forever identified with her — weaving together strength and vulnerability, creativity and nurturing, passion and discipline, pragmatism and intuition, intellect and imagination, claiming them all, the masculine and the feminine, as part of our essence and expression.

Today we need Athena’s wisdom more than ever. She breathes soul and compassion — exactly what has been missing — into the traditionally masculine world of work and success. Her emergence, fully armed and independent, from Zeus’s head, and her total ease in the practical world of men, whether on the battlefield or in the affairs of the city; her inventive creativity; her passion for law, justice, and politics — they all serve as a reminder that creation and action are as inherently natural to women as they are to men. Women don’t need to leave behind the deeper parts of themselves in order to thrive in a male- dominated world. In fact, women — and men, too — need to reclaim these instinctual strengths if they are to tap into their inner wisdom and redefine success.

Wisdom is precisely what is missing when — like rats in the famous experiment conducted by B. F. Skinner more than fifty years ago — we press the same levers again and again even though there is no longer any real reward. By bringing deeper awareness into our everyday lives, wisdom frees us from the narrow reality we’re trapped in — a reality consumed by the first two metrics of success, money and power, long after they have ceased to fulfill us. Indeed, we continue to pull the levers not only after their diminishing returns have been exhausted, but even after it’s clear they’re actually causing us harm in terms of our health, our peace of mind, and our relationships. Wisdom is about recognizing what we’re really seeking: connection and love. But in order to find them, we need to drop our relentless pursuit of success as society defines it for something more genuine, more meaningful, and more fulfilling.

Arianna Huffington

"Why We Need Wisdom More Than Ever," by Arianna Huffington. Thrive Global. November 30, 2016. Excerpt from Thrive: The Third Metric to Redefining Success and Creating a Life of Well-Being, Wisdom, and Wonder pp. 116–130. As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.

exerting one's strength

There are two ways of exerting one's strength; one is pushing down, the other is pulling up. 

Booker T. Washington

Booker T. Washington: Educator and Leader by Kristin Thoennes Keller. Capstone Press. 2005. p.19 As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.

to be stronger men

Oh, do not pray for easy lives; pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers; pray for powers equal to your tasks! Then the doing of your work will be no miracle. But you shall be a miracle. 

Phillips Brooks

Christ the Life and Light. Dutton. 1905. p. 209.  As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World. 

the virtue of resilience

Resilience is the virtue that enables people to move through hardship and become better. No one escapes pain, fear, and suffering. Yet from pain can come wisdom, from fear can come courage, from suffering can come strength – if we have the virtue of resilience. 

Resilience: Hard-won Wisdom for Living a Better Life by Eric Greitens. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. 2015. p.3

strength

O, it is excellent

To have a giant's strength, but it is tyrannous

To use it like a giant.

Isabella to Angelo in Measure for Measure by William Shakespeare. Act 2, Sc. 2

roots and foundations and organic processes

It is sometimes supposed that men must organize in order to affect their plans. It is sometimes said or organizations that the development must come from the top down. These ideas have their worth, but they lay too little weight on the role of the individual. Strong leadership will always be needed and prized, but it cannot be responsible for all growth. It is not generally responsible for the most important growth. Trees and children do not grow from the top down. Men do not construct buildings from the top down. The growth that counts is based on roots and foundations and organic processes that are hidden from view. What is exposed is less important than what is not. So it is with people. I cannot look to others or to outside circumstances to provide the basis for my work. The vital strength lies within my own will and the grace of God. The most important struggles and achievements in life are not in society but in the human heart.

Dennis Rasmussen

The Lord’s Question: Thoughts on the Life of Response. Brigham Young University Press. April 1985. Chapter Four, “Whom Shall I Send?” p.40

stand out from the crowd

Self-doubt and fear can lead you to want to blend in with those around you. But, trying to fit in with the crowd will cause you to disguise who you really are. Trust that you're mentally strong enough to stand out and dare to be different.

Amy Morin

"9 Ways to Avoid Giving Away Your Personal Power" Inc.com. Dec. 21, 2015

the challenge of leadership

The challenge of leadership is to be strong, but not rude; be kind, but not weak; be bold, but not bully; be thoughtful, but not lazy; be humble, but not timid; be proud, but not arrogant; have humor, but without folly.

Jim Rohn

"50 Inspiring Quotes on Leadership for Everyone" Time. July 1, 2015

revealing vulnerability

Revealing vulnerability is counterintuitive for a CEO. In such an exposed role, it can feel as though demonstrating anything other than strength is seen as flawed, maybe even broken. Hurt argues that this is not the case: “Certainly, human beings work at your company, none of them are perfect. They’ll respect you for actually admitting when you’ve made a mistake. They’ll model it. You won’t have an air of bullshit in your company.”

Drake Baer (presentation by Bazaarvoice CEO Brett Hurt)

"You Aren’t Born Knowing How to Be a CEO" First Round Review. 7/2/2013

know thyself

Skills and experience might land you a leadership position with a large business organization, but they don’t make you a true leader.

Leadership comes from inside—and the greatest leaders first question themselves before they tackle the world around them.

Develop an inner clarity. Understand your bright and dark sides, your personal strengths and weakness. Self-comprehension is a fundamental precondition necessary for real leadership.

In the 6th century BC Thales, one of the Seven Sages of ancient Greece, is reported to have offered the famous instruction “know thyself.”  This idea of self-inquiry as a mandatory feature of a well-lived life rapidly attained proverbial status among the Greeks.  In fact, it was even deemed worthy of inscription on the wall of Apollo’s temple at Delphi.  Sayings based on great wisdom, such as this one, all have one thing in common, regardless of the time and place where they occur: they all share one thing in common: they are encouragements to engage in conduct which is demanding and out of the ordinary but offers prospects of great reward.  Thales’ teaching is a classic illustration of this point.

Panos Mourdoukoutas

"The First Golden Rule Of Leadership" Forbes. 9/5/2015

rectitude

Bushido refers not only to martial rectitude, but to personal rectitude: Rectitude or Justice, is the strongest virtue of Bushido. A well-known samurai defines it this way: ‘Rectitude is one’s power to decide upon a course of conduct in accordance with reason, without wavering; to die when to die is right, to strike when to strike is right.’ Another speaks of it in the following terms: ‘Rectitude is the bone that gives firmness and stature. Without bones the head cannot rest on top of the spine, nor hands move nor feet stand. So without Rectitude neither talent nor learning can make the human frame into a samurai.’

Tim Clark

"The Bushido Code: The Eight Virtues of the Samurai" The Art of Manliness. 9/14/2008

crucibles of leadership

[O]ne of the most reliable indicators and predictors of true leadership is an individual’s ability to find meaning in negative events and to learn from even the most trying circumstances. Put another way, the skills required to conquer adversity and emerge stronger and more committed than ever are the same ones that make for extraordinary leaders…. 

We came to call the experiences that shape leaders “crucibles,” after the vessels medieval alchemists used in their attempts to turn base metals into gold. For the leaders we interviewed, the crucible experience was a trial and a test, a point of deep self-reflection that forced them to question who they were and what mattered to them. It required them to examine their values, question their assumptions, hone their judgment. And, invariably, they emerged from the crucible stronger and more sure of themselves and their purpose—changed in some fundamental way….

So, what allow[s]… people to not only cope with these difficult situations but also learn from them? We believe that great leaders possess four essential skills, and, we were surprised to learn, these happen to be the same skills that allow a person to find meaning in what could be a debilitating experience. First is the ability to engage others in shared meaning…. Second is a distinctive and compelling voice…. Third is a sense of integrity (including a strong set of values). 

But by far the most critical skill of the four is what we call “adaptive capacity.” This is, in essence, applied creativity—an almost magical ability to transcend adversity, with all its attendant stresses, and to emerge stronger than before. It’s composed of two primary qualities: the ability to grasp context, and hardiness. The ability to grasp context implies an ability to weigh a welter of factors, ranging from how very different groups of people will interpret a gesture to being able to put a situation in perspective. Without this, leaders are utterly lost, because they cannot connect with their constituents….

It is the combination of hardiness and ability to grasp context that, above all, allows a person to not only survive an ordeal, but to learn from it, and to emerge stronger, more engaged, and more committed than ever. These attributes allow leaders to grow from their crucibles, instead of being destroyed by them—to find opportunity where others might find only despair. This is the stuff of true leadership.

Warren Bennis and Robert J. Thomas

"Crucibles of Leadership" Harvard Business Review. September 2002

cultivate resilience

According to experts, the following 11 activities help cultivate resilience:

1. Having a core set of beliefs that nothing can shake.
2. Finding meaning in whatever stressful or traumatic thing that has happened.
3. Maintaining a positive outlook.
4. Taking cues from someone else who is especially resilient.
5. Not running away from things that scare you: Face them.
6. Reaching out for support when things go haywire.
7. Learning new things as often as you can.
8. Having an exercise regimen you’ll stick to.
9. Not beating yourself up or dwelling on the past.
10. Recognizing what makes you uniquely strong—and owning it.
11. Practicing mindfulness.

Mindfulness deserves a special mention. In a study, Marines who underwent an eight-week course in mindfulness showed great gains in resilience. No only did their heart rate and breathing rate show less reactivity when faced with a stressful situation, their brains changed too: They showed lower activation in the region of the brain associated with emotional reactions. By the end of training, their brains looked more resilient.


Samantha Boardman M.D.
"Bounce Back: 11 Ways to be More Resilient: Data-driven insights to help deal with stress." Psychology Today. 8/14/2015

the great north wind

It was the great north wind that made the Vikings. 

Scandanavian Proverb

As quoted in Half Broke Horses by Jeannette Walls, Simon and Schuster, 2009

you can’t wait for the sun to rise

At the end of a recent podcast interview, the host asked me, “What’s the best advice you ever got?” Before I tell you what I said allow me to rewind to 2007 when I had another career decision to make: hold on to a large, steady paycheck as the vice president of a global PR firm or commit full-time to my growing writing and public speaking business. At the time I was doing some freelance writing and I interviewed the real-life Chris Gardner, the man who actor Will Smith portrayed in the movie, The Pursuit of Happyness... Gardner told me the true story of how he spent nights in the bathroom of a subway station along with his 2-year-old son. In the daytime Gardner would put on his one suit, drop off his kid at daycare and take unpaid classes to become a stockbroker. You can guess how the story ends. Gardner rose to the top of his firm and became a multi-millionaire.

I knew the Oakland, California subway station Gardner had slept in because I passed it each day on my train trip into San Francisco. I had plenty of time to contemplate the advice he gave, words that changed the course of my career. “How did you find the strength, the spirit, to keep going?” I asked Gardner. “Carmine, here’s the secret to success: find something you love to do so much, you can’t wait for the sun to rise to do it all over again.”

Each day when I rode past the station I would think about those words. It forced me to question my choices and the daily trips into the city, which I dreaded. I wasn’t waiting for the sun to shine; I was waiting for it to go down so I could head home. I quit the PR firm, trading the stability of a salary for the instability of a start-up. Last week I was invited to BookExpo America, a prestigious book industry conference in New York, to sign copies of my sixth book. Gardner’s advice had changed my life and my business.

The most inspiring leaders are those who don’t work at a job but pursue a calling. In doing so they inspire the rest of us to be our best selves and to match our skills with our passions. They give us confidence to pursue our dreams.

Carmine Gallo

Homeless Man Turned Millionaire Offers The Best Advice I Ever Got. 6/11/2012. Forbes.