listening for the good

Stephen: First I want to talk about—you have issued another beautiful book inspired by your late mother. It's called Just Shine!. One of the things I understand she says is, you don't know what's going on with someone else. You may disagree with them.

Justice Sotomayor: You have to ask them.

Stephen: Does that come in handy in your job?

Justice Sotomayor: A lot. But she showed me something else, which is you can't really judge people by their opinions because you may differ in them. You may not like what people do. One of my favorite stories—she had a friend who talked nonstop. How many of you have those kinds of friends? I bet a lot of you. They walk in, they never stop talking. My brother and I would scurry out of the room as fast as we could. My brother would probably go out to play basketball. I would go hide in my room and read. My mother would sit there and just listen.

One day after this woman had left, I looked at her and said, "How do you have that patience?" And she said, "Sonia, it can be frustrating moments, but I always remember that she really has such a wonderful heart. When I've been sick, she comes over and she's the first one to bring me food. If I am stuck not having a ride somewhere"—so she didn't drive at the time—"I call her up and she offers before I say anything. Not everybody does that."

She taught me to look for the best in people. That was the lesson that moment gave me, and it's one I look for in my colleagues, you know. I don't agree with them much—at least not with the majority—and they can be really frustrating. And there are moments when I want to scurry out of the room. But I don't. And what I look for to maintain our collegiality is the good in them. My mother was right—there is good in almost everyone. I say "almost everyone" because I was a prosecutor, and there are some evil people.

Sotomayor, Sonia. Interview by Stephen Colbert. The Late Show with Stephen Colbert. YouTube, uploaded by The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, 10 Sept. 2025, https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xKSzq4keAx8.

growth through shared work

Jesus knew how to involve his disciples in the process of life. He gave them important and specific things to do for their development. Other leaders have sought to be so omnicompetent that they have tried to do everything themselves, which produces little growth in others. Jesus trusts his followers enough to share his work with them so that they can grow. That is one of the greatest lessons of his leadership. If we brush other people aside in order to see a task done more quickly and effectively, the task may get done all right, but without the growth and development in followers that is so important. Because Jesus knows that this life is purposeful and that we have been placed on this planet in order to perform and grow, growth then becomes one of the great ends of life as well as a means.

Spencer W. Kimball

"Jesus, The Perfect Leader" January 15, 1977. From an address delivered to the Young Presidents organization, Sun Valley, Idaho. 

you've got to make mistakes

No one does the leader's job flawlessly, believe me. You've got to make mistakes and learn from them. Yankees manager Joe Torree got fired three times during his career. Now he's looked upon as the icon of the game. He learned some things along the way. 

In his book, Jack: Straight from the Gut, Jack Welch freely admits he made many hiring mistakes in his early years. He made a lot of decisions from instinct. But when he was wrong, he'd say, "It's my fault." He'd ask himself why he was wrong, he'd listen to other people, he'd get more data, and he'd figure it out. And he just kept getting better and better. He also recognized that it's not useful to beat other people up when they make mistakes. To the contrary, that's the time to coach them, encourage them, and help them regain their self-confidence.

Larry Bossidy

Execution: The Discipline of Getting Things Done by Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan with Charles Burck. 2002. Crown Business, NY, NY. p. 83

know thyself

Know thyself - it's advice as old as the hills, and it's the core of authenticity. When you know yourself, you are comfortable with your strengths and not crippled by your shortcomings. You know your behavioral blind sides and emotional blockages, and you have a modus operandi for dealing with them - you draw on the people around you. Self-awareness gives you the capacity to learn from your mistakes as well as your successes. It enables you to keep growing.

Nowhere is self-awareness more important than in an execution culture, which taps every part of the brain and emotional makeup. Few leaders have the intellectual firepower to be good judges of people, good strategists, and good operating leaders, and at the same time talk to customers and do all the other things the job demands. But if you know where you're short, at least you can reinforce those areas and get some help for your business or unit. You put mechanisms in place to help you get it done. The person who doesn't even recognize where she is lacking never gets it done. 

Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan

Execution: The Discipline of Getting Things Done by Larry Bossidy & Ram Charan with Charles Burck. 2002. Crown Business, NY, NY. p. 81, 82

the world revolves around change

The world revolves around change. Birth and death, growth and destruction, rise and fall, summer and winter. It’s never the same from one day to another no matter how much it might seem that it is.

“No man ever steps in the same river twice…” – Heraclitus

Our minds would love to predict and plan for everything that’s going to happen. But it’s simply not possible. And these expectations not only have a negative effect on our emotional state, they actually leave us less powerful than we really could be. 

It’s so much more effective to simply take things as they present themselves, to live in the moment (like there’s another moment you could live in), and solve issues and items as they arise, than to constantly expect.

It’s not that I’m anti-planning (I most certainly am not), but the stone-cold attachment to the plan (and all the expectation therein) is a little like falling out of a rowboat and continuing to row even through you have no oars and no boat under you anymore. Your plan (and image) of how this should have gone is no longer relevant but you still struggle to reconcile the space between your expectations and reality. 

Life can be like that at times. On some occasions you have to realize that the game has changed (sometimes dramatically so) and you need to pivot. Deal with your reality.

Wake up, you’re in the water. Stop waving your arms about and paddle to shore, dammit!

Gary John Bishop

Unfu*k Yourself: Get out of your head and into your life by Gary John Bishop. Harper One. 2017. p.175. 176

change happens

In any business environment, change happens.

Let’s rephrase: In any business environment, change should happen. It shows you're committed to the kind of growth and evolution it takes to stay modern, relevant, and competitive.

Countless factors make change inevitable. Think of technological advancements, globalization, cultural shifts, and shifting economies. And since nobody's corporate goals include falling behind or growing stale, embracing change is a must.

But what kind of change are we talking about here? Change can include things like:

• Introducing new software or updating marketing practices
• Updated business processes
• A full-on restructuring
• Leadership changes
• Updated thinking
• Budget constraints
• Shifts in strategy

These all fall under the umbrella of organizational change. If you’re already on board with shaking things up, you’re ahead of the game. And you're not alone.

According to Gartner, 99% of all organizations have undergone a major organizational change in the last three years. But big or small, change doesn't happen naturally. Therefore, effective change requires a clear action plan.

Emily Smith

"7 Organizational Change Management Frameworks That Stick," Remesh Blog. October 10, 2021

after reading over 200 self-improvement books

After reading over 200 self-improvement books over the past thirty years I have determined all self-improvement and success come down to five keystone lessons that all other principles rest upon.

1. Mindset determines your success.
2. Goals create the map to your success.
3. Modeling shows what leads to success. 
4. Systems create the path to your success. 
5. Perseverance makes you successful.

...To succeed in life, you must develop a positive and growth-oriented mindset that allows you to overcome challenges and learn from your mistakes. You should set realistic and achievable goals that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant and time-bound. You must create a system of processes, routines, and habits that help you consistently and efficiently move closer to achieving your goals. Finally, you must cultivate the habit of perseverance, which enables you to keep going even when things get tough and never give up on your goals. This is what 200 self-help books will teach you.

Steve Burns

I Read 200 Self-Improvement Books To Learn These 5 Lessons. New Trader U. March 12, 2023. 

frightened of change?

Frightened of change? But what can exist without it? What’s closer to nature’s heart? Can you take a hot bath and leave the firewood as it was? Eat food without transforming it? Can any vital process take place without something being changed? 

Can’t you see? It’s just the same with you – and just as vital to nature.

Marcus Aurelius

Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. Modern Library. 2003. P.88, Book 7, #18 Also see The Internet Classics Archive | The Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (mit.edu)

he always GETS it right

Andy Grove once told me, over a cup of Jamocha Almond Fudge ice cream at Baskin Robbins in Los Altos, “F*@&ing Steve Jobs always gets it right.”

“Nobody’s always right,” I said.

“I didn’t say Steve IS always right. I said he always GETS it right. Like anyone, he is wrong all the time, but he insists, and not gently either, that people tell him when he’s wrong, so he always gets it right in the end.”

I thought a lot about this conversation over the next couple of years. I think Andy was exactly right: a big part of Steve Jobs’s genius came from his willingness to be proven wrong. Here’s how he described it in his own words:

Jobs: I don’t mind being wrong. And I’ll admit that I’m wrong a lot. It doesn’t really matter to me too much. What matters to me is that we do the right thing. Watch the video >>

In other words, you don’t have to grovel or pretend to be worse than you are. You just need to accept the possibility that whatever you’re saying may be wrong. Don’t be arrogant. Be curious.

Kim Scott

"How to give humble feedback," by Kim Scott. Radical Candor. Accessed August 17, 2022

a compelling and uncontested priority

It can be difficult to choose the right quest. Should the company expand into new regions, get closer to customers, innovate with more partners, get faster and more responsive, or become more sustainable? Executives sometimes say “all of the above”—but that’s too much to handle at once. The right quest should be a compelling and uncontested priority. In some of the cases we analyzed, companies straddled quests (customer focus and agility, for instance, or innovation and sustainability). That can work as long as the components are fused into one cogent focus.

Bharat N. Anand and Jean-Louis Barsoux

"What Everyone Gets Wrong About Change Management," Harvard Business Review. November-December 2017. 

the pursuit of value

The trigger for any corporate transformation is the pursuit of value. Ideally, that entails both improving efficiency (through streamlining and cost cutting) and reinvesting in growth. But many transformation efforts derail because they focus too narrowly on one or the other.

In some cases, attempts to streamline the business through productivity improvements, outsourcing, divestments, or restructuring undermine growth. The cuts are so deep that they hollow out capabilities, sap morale, and remove the slack that could have fueled new endeavors.

Bharat N. Anand and Jean-Louis Barsoux

"What Everyone Gets Wrong About Change Management," Harvard Business Review. November-December 2017. 

growing others

Before you are a leader, success is all about growing yourself. When you become a leader, success is all about growing others.

Jack Welch

Winning: The Ultimate Business How-To Book by Jack Welch, Suzy Welch. HarperCollins. 2009. As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.

do things that you don’t want to

It’s in the act of having to do things that you don’t want to that you learn something about moving past the self. Past the ego.”

bell hooks

As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.

the rough side of the mountain

It's the rough side of the mountain that's easiest to climb; the smooth side doesn't have anything for you to hang on to. 

Aretha Franklin

"The Swingin' Aretha," Ebony. March 1964. p.85. As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World.  

what ships are built for

 A ship in harbor is safe, but that is not what ships are built for.

John A. Shedd

Salt From My Attic. Mosher Press. 1928. As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World. 

a place that remains unchanged

There is nothing like returning to a place that remains unchanged to find the ways in which you yourself have altered.

Nelson Mandela

Nelson Mandela: A Leader for Freedom, by Kekla Magoon. ABDO Publishing Company. 2008. p.33.  As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World. 

to be stronger men

Oh, do not pray for easy lives; pray to be stronger men! Do not pray for tasks equal to your powers; pray for powers equal to your tasks! Then the doing of your work will be no miracle. But you shall be a miracle. 

Phillips Brooks

Christ the Life and Light. Dutton. 1905. p. 209.  As found in 2022 Great Quotes From Great Leaders Boxed Calendar: 365 Inspirational Quotes From Leaders Who Shaped the World. 

questions to understand culture

Culture is felt through the behaviors that are reinforced or discouraged on a day-to-day basis on teams. If you want to get a sense of the story of the leader and team’s culture, use detailed questions. You will get a much better sense based on the responses, especially if the leader struggles to think of what to say. If you are a manager, prepare to answer detailed questions that illustrate your team’s culture...

Examples:

• Tell me about a time a team member changed your mind?
• Tell me about someone you are proud of.
• Do you fully disconnect during holidays and vacations?
• Describe a recent success or win. 
• Tell me about a disagreement or conflict on the team. 
• How did you start your last team meeting? 
• What is your ideal person for this role?
• Who have you promoted and why?
• Tell me about the last person you recognized.
• How do you focus on your own growth and development?

Karen Eber

"10 questions to ask in a job interview that will really expose a company’s culture," Fast Company. April 8, 2021

these little minute things

I am always for the consideration of these little minute things that concern us to-day. We should always be engaged in doing the things that belong to to-day. There is but one course that you and I can pursue and be right, and that is, to be sufficiently humble to look at the most minute fibers. The large roots of a tree receive their nourishment through the little fibers, and they receive it from the fountain; and then that nourishment is sent through the mains trunk of the tree into the limbs, branches, and twigs. 

Heber C. Kimball

Journal of Discourses, Vol.8, p.328

not knowing everything

Move and the way will open. – ZEN PROVERB

At the start of many important endeavors, you’ll often think: How can I do this? I don’t even know enough to begin. It’s a common excuse, and it’s often a mask for cowardice. When we say that we don’t know what to do, it’s often not information we’re lacking, but courage.

When we begin, we sometimes lack the skills, knowledge, and experience to carry out even the most basic tasks. Of course we do. If we had the experience we needed, we’d already be done.

Not knowing everything cannot be an excuse for not doing anything.

Resilience: Hard-won Wisdom for Living a Better Life by Eric Greitens. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. 2015. p.39, 47