not knowing everything

Move and the way will open. – ZEN PROVERB

At the start of many important endeavors, you’ll often think: How can I do this? I don’t even know enough to begin. It’s a common excuse, and it’s often a mask for cowardice. When we say that we don’t know what to do, it’s often not information we’re lacking, but courage.

When we begin, we sometimes lack the skills, knowledge, and experience to carry out even the most basic tasks. Of course we do. If we had the experience we needed, we’d already be done.

Not knowing everything cannot be an excuse for not doing anything.

Resilience: Hard-won Wisdom for Living a Better Life by Eric Greitens. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. 2015. p.39, 47 

the stockdale paradox

Admiral James Stockdale, a pilot whose plane was shot down over Vietnam in 1965… observed that the POWs who broke the fastest were those who deluded themselves about the severity of their ordeal. They imagined that they would be freed next week, or next month, or by Christmas. But he lasted unbroken for seven and a half years because, in part, he refused to lie to himself.

Here’s how he explained the Stockdale Paradox: “You must never confuse faith that you will prevail in the end – which you can never afford to lose – with the discipline to confront the most brutal facts of your current reality, whatever they might be.”

Resilience: Hard-won Wisdom for Living a Better Life by Eric Greitens. Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. 2015. p.30

faith in the future

For every worry under the sun,

There is a remedy, or there is none;

If there be one, hurry and find it,

If there be none, never mind it.

–LeGrand Richards, CN 31 March 1979,4

We must have faith in the future regardless of the ultimate eventualities. There could be no greater calamity in this world than the calamity of sitting down and waiting for calamity. We must not let the things which we can’t do keep us from doing the things we can do…. The future will always be better for those who are best prepared.


Richard L. Evans, Church News, June 25, 1988, p.2 as found in Prophetic Statements on Food Storage for Latter-day Saints by Neil H. Leash. Cedar Fort. 1999. p.184

head pointed toward the sun

Prison and the authorities conspire to rob each man of his dignity. In and of itself, that assured that I would survive, for any man or institution that tries to rob me of my dignity will lose because I will not part with it at any price or under any pressure. I never seriously considered the possibility that I would not emerge from prison one day. I never thought that a life sentence truly meant life and that I would die behind bars. Perhaps I was denying this prospect because it was too unpleasant to contemplate. But I always knew that someday I would once again feel the grass under my feet and walk in the sunshine as a free man.

I am fundamentally an optimist. Whether that comes from nature or nurture, I cannot say. Part of being optimistic is keeping one’s head pointed toward the sun, one’s feet moving forward. There were many dark moments when my faith in humanity was sorely tested, but I would not and could not give myself up to despair. That way lay defeat and death.

Nelson Mandela

Long Walk to Freedom: The Autobiography of Nelson Mandela. Back Bay Books. 1995. p. 391

5 P's of ethical power

One of my favorite books is The Power of Ethical Management, written by Ken Blanchard and Norman Vincent Peale. In their book, Blanchard and Peale discuss the five principles of ethical decision-making which they call the “Five P’s of Ethical Power.”...

Purpose—Your purpose is the road you choose to travel, the meaning and direction of your life. It’s the driving force of why you do what you do. For some it may be rooted in their spiritual faith. Others may find their purpose is something they feel called to do, such as serving those in need, raising responsible children, or leaving the world a better place than they found it. Aligning the activities of your life according to your purpose gives you a clear sense of direction, so when you’re faced with challenging circumstances or difficult decisions, you’re able to filter those occasions through the lens of your purpose and make choices that keep you on track.

Pride—Unlike false pride, which stems from a distorted sense of self-importance that causes people to believe and act like they are better than others, a healthy sense of pride springs from a positive self-image and confidence in one’s abilities. A proper sense of pride mixed with a good dose of humility is the balance you’re seeking. Being driven by false pride causes you to seek the approval and acceptance of others which can overly influence you to take the easy way out when faced with a tough situation.

Patience—Patience is in short supply in our culture. We live in a hyper-connected, instantaneous world where virtually anything we want is just a click away. Blanchard and Peale describe patience as having a faith and belief that things will work out well, as long as we stick to our values and principles. Giving in to instant gratification is one of the biggest temptations we face and it causes us to make decisions that aren’t in alignment with our purpose and values. Enduring the struggles and challenges life throws our way helps develop the strength of our character. Much like prematurely opening a caterpillar cocoon leads to a weakened and under-developed butterfly, choosing the path of expediency leaves us with an under-developed character and weakens our ethical power.

Persistence—This component of ethical power is about staying the course and remaining true to your purpose and values. Persistence is about commitment, not interest. When you have interest in something, you do it when it’s convenient. When you’re committed, you do it no matter what! One of my favorite “Yoda-isms” from the Star Wars movies is “Do or do not. There is no try.” When it comes to making ethical decisions, there is never a right time to do the wrong thing. Persistence keeps us on the straight and narrow path.

Perspective—All the other elements of ethical power emanate from the core of perspective. Perspective is about having the big picture view of situations and understanding what’s truly important. Too often we make snap decisions in the heat of the moment and neglect to step back and examine the situation from a bigger perspective. Maintaining the proper perspective is also about paying attention to our inner-self and not just our task-oriented outer-self. Taking the time to enter each day with prayer, meditation, exercise, or solitude helps foster self-reflection which is needed to help us maintain the right perspective about life.

Randy Conley

"Got Ethics? The 5 Principles of Ethical Leaders" Leading with Trust. 6/12/2016

Taken from the book The Power of Ethical Management by by Ken Blanchard and Norman Vincent Peale. Harper Collins, 1988

find your inner grist

Today, most assume that Xbox was somehow destined to be a winner, but having been Microsoft’s chief Xbox officer, I am here to report that its early years were much more like a ship on the rocks than a sloop cutting through the waves.... As I reflect on surviving the near-death Xbox experience, which we turned around using a strategy process called the 3P Framework to create Xbox 360... I would humbly suggest the following...

Find your inner grist. Being in the depths of a crisis strikes at the core of your being and challenges your very soul. As an individual, you have to believe that you can lead the team successfully and fix the issues you face. If you have this type of faith in yourself and in others, it will become a force-multiplier, making you and the team stronger. You also must consciously decide to persevere regardless of the obstacles, and in the process have the courage to make difficult make-or-break decisions. I’ve heard several people recently define this combination of faith, perseverance, and courage as grist, a wonderfully rough-hewn word that clearly communicates what it takes to transform crises into opportunities. There is no logical, rational reason why Xbox was successful, but the team absolutely had the grist required to do what others thought was improbable.

Robbie Bach

"The Big Leadership Lessons I Learned Almost Failing To Create Xbox For Microsoft" Forbes. 11/5/2015

cultivate resilience

According to experts, the following 11 activities help cultivate resilience:

1. Having a core set of beliefs that nothing can shake.
2. Finding meaning in whatever stressful or traumatic thing that has happened.
3. Maintaining a positive outlook.
4. Taking cues from someone else who is especially resilient.
5. Not running away from things that scare you: Face them.
6. Reaching out for support when things go haywire.
7. Learning new things as often as you can.
8. Having an exercise regimen you’ll stick to.
9. Not beating yourself up or dwelling on the past.
10. Recognizing what makes you uniquely strong—and owning it.
11. Practicing mindfulness.

Mindfulness deserves a special mention. In a study, Marines who underwent an eight-week course in mindfulness showed great gains in resilience. No only did their heart rate and breathing rate show less reactivity when faced with a stressful situation, their brains changed too: They showed lower activation in the region of the brain associated with emotional reactions. By the end of training, their brains looked more resilient.


Samantha Boardman M.D.
"Bounce Back: 11 Ways to be More Resilient: Data-driven insights to help deal with stress." Psychology Today. 8/14/2015

say yes – then learn

If somebody offers you an amazing opportunity but you are not sure you can do it, say yes – then learn how to do it later!

Richard Branson

"Say yes, then learn how to do it later." Richard Branson's Blog. 9/18/2013

communities... make change believable

There’s something really powerful about groups and shared experiences. People might be skeptical about their ability to change if they're by themselves, but a group will convince them to suspend disbelief. A community creates belief.

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For most people who overhaul their lives, there are no seminal moments or life-altering disasters. There are simply communities—sometimes of just one other person—who make change believable.

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We do know that for habits to permanently change, people must believe that change is feasible. The same process that makes AA so effective—the power of a group to teach individuals how to believe—happens whenever people come together to help one another change. Belief is easier when it occurs within a community.

Charles Duhigg

The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business. Random House. 2012.

earn the faith of others

Many aspiring leaders think that leadership is about being the smartest person in the room, the loudest, the most charismatic, or the wealthiest. None of these is true.

It’s about faith. Start small. Achieve results. Earn confidence. Listen hard. Be empathetic. Think before you talk.

Over time, you will earn the faith of others. When you do, don’t let it go to your head. Don’t suddenly act like an ego-driven Master of the Universe. Once you do this, the faith that people have in you will start to erode.

Leadership isn’t complicated, but it is hard. No one ever said it was easy to earn and hold the faith of others. But it is easier when you understand that this is what powers all effective leaders.

Bruce Kasanoff

"Leadership in One Word = Faith." Forbes. 7/23/2015

it takes a community to change

When trying to lead change, are we considering the power and necessity of communicating the vision and value proposition of the change not only to the target audience, but also to their community?

I recently read Alana Semuels’ Atlantic article, “The Town That Decided to Send All Its Kids to College,”, about Baldwin,  a small town in Michigan with significant economic challenges:

Baldwin is the county seat of Lake County, where 27.9 percent of residents live below the poverty level, according to census data. That’s the second-highest poverty level in the state of Michigan. Just 8 percent of people living in Lake County have a bachelor’s degree or higher, compared to 25 percent of the state of Michigan.

A group of dedicated residents developed the Baldwin Promise,  a program providing "middle-dollar" scholarships up to $5,000 per year for 4 years to every single graduate of Baldwin High School regardless of merit or need. Raising the scholarship money was an obvious obstacle for the Baldwin Promise team, but according to Semuels, the key to the program was really about changing the story being told in the community. “The Baldwin Promise…  is more than just $5,000 a year for four years of college. It brought with it a complete change in how the town viewed education.”

Take a look at how the Baldwin Promise leadership team helped to shape and reinforce the vision of attaining a college education within the community:

• “When 5-year-olds enter Baldwin Schools, they’re tasked with creating an image of themselves, wearing a mortarboard, made out of construction paper. Those faces, black, white, and brown, are pasted onto a giant banner, “College begins with Kindergarten,” in the elementary school’s main hallway.”
• “In the past, elementary-school teachers wouldn’t really speak about college… But now, students learn about opportunities outside Baldwin from the time they start elementary school all through middle school and high school.”
• “Ayana Richardson, an effusive, put-together woman with two master’s degrees who runs the high school’s College Access Center… instituted Decision Day, a big assembly where seniors walk out into an auditorium and announce where they’re attending, to cheers.”

Charles Duhigg, author of The Power of Habit writes, “There’s something really powerful about groups and shared experiences. People might be skeptical about their ability to change if they’re by themselves, but a group will convince them to suspend disbelief. A community creates belief.”

Michelle Miller-Adams is an associate professor at Grand Valley State University who studied the promise scholarship movement. Her research indicates that promise scholarships can bring together a community and make it pull together in ways it never has before. She explains that, "The pool of money serves as a catalyst for a lot of other things.” “At least as important is that messaging: ‘We believe in education, we’re going to support our youth.’ That’s just as important as the money itself.” To some, the promise is just a “wrapper,” a way to simply market the idea of college. But in Baldwin, that wrapper is a big deal. That’s because it comes with the knowledge that the community is pulling for you."

There are powerful lessons from the story of how the Baldwin Promise team recognized what communications needed to occur, and how they helped to embed that shared vision into the community. Their efforts went beyond offering a solution ($5,000 scholarships to high school students), but reached to the heart of how these students and the community they live in can go from college ambivalence to a culture that values and supports higher education. In our own change environments, do we understand how to support the entire change community with clear, urgent and consistent messages?


Adam Dibble
"It Takes A Community To Change." leadershipYES. 8/19/2015

and make sure to read:

"The Town That Decided To Send All It's Kids To College" by Alana Semuels. The Atlantic. 8/18/2015

and

The Power of Habit: Why We Do What We Do in Life and Business by Charles Duhigg. Random House. 2012